How to Tame Your Temper: A Zen Lesson

We all have moments when we lose our temper and say or do things that we regret later. Anger is a powerful emotion that can cloud our judgment and cause us to act impulsively. But is anger really a part of who we are, or is it something that we can control and overcome?
The Unseen Beast Within:
There is a Zen story that illustrates this point very well. It goes like this:
A Zen student came to Bankei, a famous Zen master, and complained: “Master, I have an uncontrollable temper. How can I cure it?”
“You have something very strange,” replied Bankei. “Let me see what you have. Can you show it to me now?”
“Just now, I cannot show it to you,” replied the other.
“When can you show it to me?” asked Bankei.
“It arises unexpectedly,” replied the student.
“Then,” concluded Bankei, “it must not be your own true nature. If it were, you could show it to me any time. You did not have it when you were born, and your parents did not give it to you. Think that over.”
This story teaches us a valuable lesson about anger and how to deal with it.
Bankei’s Profound Insight:
Bankei’s response holds the essence of the story’s moral lesson. He astutely observes that if the temper were indeed the student’s true nature, it would be something that he could reveal at any given moment. He draws attention to the fact that the temper does not align with the student’s innate essence, as it is not readily controllable or accessible. Bankei then takes the student through a logical journey: since the temper was absent at birth and not given by parents, it cannot be an inherent part of his true nature.
The Moral:
The story of the Zen student and Bankei impart a moral lesson that is universally applicable and profoundly insightful:
- Self-Reflection: The story prompts us to reflect on our own behaviour and emotions. Just as the student grappled with his temper, we all have aspects of ourselves that we wish to change or control. It encourages us to assess whether these aspects truly align with our core being or are merely transient traits.
- Distinctive Nature: The story highlights the notion that our true nature is fundamentally pure, serene, and untouched by negative emotions. Bankei’s reasoning underscores the idea that characteristics contradicting this inherent nature are learned or conditioned over time, and hence, they can be transformed.
- Impermanence of Emotions: This tale underscores the transient nature of emotions. By acknowledging that emotions like temper can arise unexpectedly, we realize that they are not a fixed part of us. They come and go, allowing us the opportunity to work towards cultivating positive qualities in their place.
- The Power of Choice: Bankei’s response empowers us to make conscious choices. The student’s inability to reveal his temper at will serves as a reminder that we possess the power to decide how we react to situations. Our true nature can guide us towards measured responses and emotional mastery.
Conclusion
The Zen story carries a profound moral that transcends time and culture. It compels us to confront our own inner struggles, question the authenticity of certain behaviours, and recognize the transformative power of our true nature. Bankei’s guidance teaches us that our core essence is inherently serene and tranquil, allowing us to master our emotions and journey towards a more harmonious existence. Just as the student left Bankei’s presence with renewed understanding, we too can embark on a path of self-discovery and self-improvement, armed with the knowledge that our true nature is resilient, compassionate, and ever-evolving.